When are you at your happiest? When do you feel like you were making the biggest impact? When do you feel like you were doing something that few others could do at your level?
Those were some of the questions I’ve been asking myself over the past few months as I worked to determine what I’d be doing in the next phase in my life, questions that ultimately pushed me to found my own leadership development practice – Romano Leadership (more on that in a moment!). I’d been fortunate to have a relatively flexible schedule with both my work and personal life over the past year, but I wasn’t feeling the sense of fulfilment that I had when I was working in education. I am certain that I will be hard-pressed to find another job quite like being a school principal, an individual responsible for the development of 1000 students and 100 staff members. As daunting and challenging as it was at times, I absolutely loved it and will forever look back on that time with so much fondness. It was incredible having a role in the growth that students and staff demonstrated over time; there was so much joy in seeing who they became months and years down the line.
My Post-Education World
After leaving education, I entered the startup world in an attempt to use my knowledge of the education space within a different realm, while also looking for more flexibility for my personal life. As I worked to build a startup from the ground up, I realized how much I valued being able to let loose creatively toward solving legitimate problems in the world. At the same time, I was able to do things in my personal life that I never would have been able to if I had remained in my role.
I embarked on a three month road trip around the country, working from home in Boise, San Francisco, and Boston, before ending up in NJ with my parents. After spending 11 years away in Houston, away from my family, it was an incredible experience to live with them once again. Especially with the pandemic exposing our own mortality, I know that the year I ended up living with them is something I’ll never regret.
My dad owns a restaurant, and definitely felt the brunt of the issues that befell the service industry due to the pandemic. I was grateful to be able to help him out in so many ways: applying for grants, managing the technological side of things, and building his outdoor dining space (I can be handy sometimes!).
The Illness
Living with my parents certainly worked out when I came down with an unknown and undiagnosed gastrointestinal illness that utterly floored me (I lost nearly 30 lbs in 4-5 weeks!). For months, I found myself heading back to my bed to rest and try to beat back whatever was causing all my issues. Unfortunately, after countless tests, doctor’s visits, and serious bills, the best answer my doctors could give me was that I was “getting old.” I found ways of coping with the symptoms that came up, and even though I wasn’t anywhere close to 100% again, I made it work.
A year out from departing the educational workforce, I decided to step back from the startup to focus on my physical and mental health. You see, I learned that one of the worst parts of having an undiagnosed illness is not knowing what to expect. I’d feel great for a day, only to experience three days of issues (or vice-versa). To be honest, this took a toll on my mental health, as I had no clue what was coming next.
When my girlfriend, Lexi, told me that she’d gotten accepted into an MBA program in Madrid, Spain and wanted me to go with her, I was both skeptical and relieved. I was skeptical of being able to live in another country for a year without a fixed income (I had some savings), while also being relieved to have an excuse to dive into personal development for the next year.
A Much Needed Restart
I arrived in Spain not knowing to expect, since I’d never even visited the continent before. I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what I was going to do next in my life, while also trying to build myself up physically and mentally. This meant doing a lot of reading, practicing yoga, disengaging with meditation, and working out.
Fortunately, I also decided to find a doctor to continue the testing I’d left behind in the US. After countless tests and way too much money spent out of pocket only to be told that they couldn’t find anything wrong with me, I gave up on testing in the US. With my 100% insurance coverage in Spain for a fraction of the cost I would have paid in the US, I figured I had nothing to lose. Within a month, I had a diagnosis and was assigned treatment. Within three months, I felt better than I had in a year. When I started to experience symptoms again, the doctor found a genetic issue I had in producing a certain enzyme that could be treated with supplements. I couldn’t believe it. All it took was moving to Spain to solve this problem!
Once that felt taken care of, I felt invigorated to start planning my transition back to the workforce. If there’s anything I’d learned about myself during the last two years, it’s that I missed working with and developing others. I needed to get to work to see what would be a good fit. When I thought about when I was the happiest or when I felt I made the biggest impact, it was in coaching others to be their best selves and most authentic leaders. Whether it was coaching students when I was a Dean of Students or coaching my leadership team when I was a Principal, those moments were always the highlights of my day.
My New Role
That is why I am excited to announce that I am founding my Executive Coaching practice, Romano Leadership. I first had an Executive Leadership Coach almost a decade ago and he helped me develop my authentic leadership style, which dramatically changed the relationships I had with the people I led. After years of seeing the success that stemmed from coaching, I am finally ready to launch my own practice. My firsthand experience with coaching others, coupled with the impact I could have in various sectors made me excited about doing what I love doing best — developing others. I’m open to a lot of aspects about where the future will take me, but coaching others is something I’ve realized has to be a nonnegotiable for me. I am at my best and I feel my best when I’m helping others be their best.